Changing seasons

In the run up to my birthday I get a weird itchy feet sensation. Not so much that I want to run off and join the circus (although I bet right now if one asked me, and they had magic circus wi-fi I probably would), but I need something to change. I need things to move. The seasons have a lot to do with this. Things feel different. It doesn't help that I did a wonderfully stupid thing last week and it was a big wake-up call that I need to sort things out and really start doing something with my life.

Wow, that was a bit over-dramatic. It's the birthday talking.

Don't get me wrong, things are going really well, but there's just a bit of 'meh' going on. I spent Thursday at Twestival with some of my most favourite people, but also met a whole host of inspiring people and it just made me think that I should be doing something else.

Which seems silly, because those of you who know me will know that I work my ass off, all day every day and most weekends. But I think that's my problem. I work and work and work, then go to the pub. Then go to an event, then get hungover, then work again.

I'm so lucky that I love my job, and the website is going really well, but that's not it. There's more to life than that. I want to go out and experience everything. I don't just want to be a successful web editor. There's just a whole heap of stuff out there that I want to be doing. I'm just not sure I have my priorities right at the moment. I don't want the rest of the year to be work and hangovers and nothing else.

I'm happy for the most part, and that's important. But in two months I'll be 27 and that's a pretty scary age. It's certainly edging more towards thirty. I don't get hung up about age and stuff like that, really I don't. But I'm not sure I want the only thing I did with my free time between the age of 26 and 27 to be going to some really cool parties.

I guess I'm just stuck in a rut.

But there's good stuff happening. There's positive changes. Secret little things that no one knows about yet. I guess it's just about making the most of the time you have. I've booked guitar lessons, I've agreed to give a talk to a bunch of interiors people next week which is really scary. I'm lucky. I don't have to get anyone's permission to do this stuff, I can do anything I like. I very nearly jumped on a train today. For no reason. Just to do something and see something new. Shame I haven't get any money.

This isn't a grumpy post. It's just me looking at things differently. Itchy feet is good for me. Sometimes I need to give myself a kick up the backside. I never have to do that about work. But sometimes it's not all about that. Sometimes I need to do something stupid to finally make good decisions.

It's time some things changed around here. You might not see them right away, but they're happening.

Flickr image from wstryder's photostream.